Big Pimpin on my BMX

Spinners
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Deuce has brought us the next trend in biking - Spinners. Check out these specs:

• Designed to fit any 20-inch wheel bicycle with handbrakes
• Polished & durable chrome finish
• World's first patented hub spinner technology
• Spins long after bike stops
• Exceeds safety testing
• Precision tooled for highest quality & durability

Next up - spinners on my Big Wheel!

Read more at Duce. Thanks to Gizmodo.

Breakin' the law!

You make something that people use. Then they abuse it, and do illegal things with your product. Are you at fault?

Regarding Grokster (a file sharing network):

"We hold that one who distributes a device with the object of promoting its use to infringe copyright, as shown by clear expression or other affirmative steps taken to foster infringement, is liable for the resulting acts of infringement by third parties," Justice Souter wrote.

Regarding guns:

Senate Republicans on Tuesday moved the National Rifle Association's top priority ahead of a $491 billion defense bill, setting up a vote on legislation to shield firearms manufacturers and dealers from lawsuits over gun crimes.

"The president believes that the manufacturer of a legal product should not be held liable for the criminal misuse of that product by others," said White House spokesman Scott McClellan.

[Senator Larry] Craig said such lawsuits are "predatory and aimed at bankrupting the firearms industry," unfairly blaming dealers and manufacturers for the crimes of gun users.

On Daily Kos and found via Boing Boing.

Super Happy Fun Balls!

DSC_4244
Originally uploaded by sem.

Somewhere in San Francisco (Levanworth Street) Sony let loose a googol (it was a number first, then a search engine) of bouncy balls down the hill for a commercial.

"It's Happy!
It's Fun!
It's Happy Fun Ball!

Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.

Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Happy Fun Ball contains a liquid core, which if exposed due to rupture should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.

Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs:
* Itching
* Vertigo
* Dizziness
* Tingling in extremities
* Loss of balance or coordination
* Slurred speech
* Temporary blindness
* Profuse Sweating
or
* Heart palpitations

If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.

Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration.

Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.

Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.

Happy Fun Ball has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee."

Find the Super Happy Fun Ball script here.
Picture from evhead.

Candy?

Candy?
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

At first these cartoon ads looked innocent enough, but look closer. These are NOT children's products but actually prophylactic ads for Japanese condoms.

There is only one cartoon character that should be pushing contraceptive devices, and that is Jessica Rabbit.

Read more at Boing Boing.

Konfabulator is Kon-Fabulous!

Konfabulator
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

This is really cool - Yahoo! bought Konfabulator and now they are offering the software for free! Get all sorts of information and applications for your desktop (Mac and PC) like weather forecasts, picture frames, battery meters and more. The screen shot is from my desktop. I have been using it for over a year now and I love it. The least you could do is try it out. It's FREE! Get it Here.

I'm Number One!

I have such an ego that I just googled myself. I know, if I do it too much, I will get hair on my palms and I might go blind, but I cannot help myself.

Anyway, type in my name on Google and...[drumroll please]

My page is the number 1 result! Woo hoo! Yay! W00T! and all that Internet jazz.

"The new phone book's here. The new phone book's here. This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need. My name in print. That really makes somebody. Things are going to start happening to me now. "
- Steven Martin in 'The Jerk'

UPDATE: I am no longer Number One. I mean, I still come up, but it is a podcast interview I did a few months ago, not my Website. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

I know you are, but what am I?

Paul Reubens Day
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Sorry guys, I have to bail on our plans. I forgot that I had already committed myself to Paul Reubans Day here in SF, so I have to put on my gray suit and white platforms and ride my bike with the other fans doing everything Pee Wee style. Ha!

Why Pancho Villa's ROCKS

Beck at Pancho Villa
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

You all know that I love Pancho Villa's. I argue that they have the best burritos in town.

Still, last night something was different. The regular mariachi guy was usurped by some white guy. It really distracts from the whole burrito experience.

Oh yeah, the gringo said his name was something silly, like Beck?

SFist.com

When bad movies get good quotes

Gelf Magazine does a weekly comparison between the quotes used to promote movies and the actual reviews. See the sample for "The Longest Yard" below or follow this link for more!

Christy Lemire, Associated Press: " 'The Longest Yard' goes the distance."

Actual line (via Yahoo): "This MTV'd-up and dumbed-down 'Longest Yard' goes the distance."
Not quoted: "This new 'Longest Yard' is less of a movie than it is a two-hour series of beer commercials—sporadically funny and frequently raunchy in a guy-friendly way. ... Two stars out of four."

Not safe for work

A quick movie of kids saying the seven words you cannot say on TV - and there is a clever twist at the end.

Click here at your own peril...

Finally science does something USEFUL!

The TurboTap!
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

After years of wasting our time with space travel and rats in mazes, science has started to tackel the real problems of day-to-day life.

Enter - the TURBO TAP! In a timed trial the Turbo Tap pours 10 pints to the standard tap's six. Impressive? Not as impressive as Four pints of Guinness in 20 seconds! See the video HERE.

Swim with the fishes

Swim with the fishes
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

This guy has some talent. He does custom mosaic work for pools and houses and his latest project is a "Finding Nemo" pool. Check out the rest of the pics here.

I gotta think the sharks might scare off some younsters.

Namesake

The Jumper
Originally uploaded by Special.

I did a flickr search for 'Kemp' and a picture of the water tower that I 'tagged' back when I was a rebellious youngster shows up in the results.

I am so anal, even my graffiti is in perfect block letters.

Actually this was taken in Kemp, Texas. The actual story associated with the picture is of a jumper who climbed the tower, but was eventually talked down.

From the Village People To ABBA

From the Village People To ABBA
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

After last week's news regarding the Village People I was feeling nostalgic for some music from age of disco. Somehow I found myself at Bimbos 365 on Saturday night screaming things like "Money Money Money," "Take a Chance on Me," and "Waterloo" at four Australians imitating four Swedes from the 70's.

All in all, it was a campy, cheesy, fun show despite minor instances of drama and injuries sustained. What is next on the list of big events guys?

Read more about Bjorn Again here.

We have a weiner!

Vespa Barbie
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Actually only one person entered, but she entered FOUR times. Kathy B. wins the strangest office 'thing' contest with her Barbie in Camo, riding a Vespa picture. The scary thing is, it belongs to her!

Congrats Kathy! I will buy you a couple drinks at the pub tonight.

But you aren't a REAL police officer!

The Village People
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Oh how the mighty have fallen! The former Police Officer in the Village People has been arrested for carrying a gun and possession of crack cocaine.

To make matters worse...

"Police found traces of cocaine and other drug paraphernalia when they searched his home at the Franciscan Mobile Home Park in Daly City, where two American pit bull terriers were locked in the former star's bedroom."

Read more at SFGate.com.

THIRTY Degrees

That is right - the temperature difference between Dublin and SF is 30 degrees today.

Dublin
Temp - 99 Degrees
REAL FEEL - 103 Degrees

San Francisco
Temp - 73 Degrees
REAL FEEL - 75 Degrees

Jumping climates like this cannot be good for my health.

UPDATE - I just checked my water consumption - I am almost done with bottle #4 of my 750 ml water bottle and about to hit refill #5. Hydration is good.

Tilt

Tilt
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

This just looked cool. Hurricane Dennis damaged BT's platform in the Gulf of Mexico. It is a ballast problem and will be fixed soon. See more pictures at ResourceInvestor.com.

NEW CONTEST

Photo_07
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

While cruising around Cubeville I was taking notice of the individual decorating styles of my co-workers. Pictures and plants were plentiful, but then every few cubes I would find something just plain weird. Take 'n sync over here. Not what you would normally expect to see hanging on a cube wall, but here it is. If I could find and capture this on my camera phone, what can you find?

Contest Rules - Email me your own picture of the weirdest item in your office by Thursday, July 14. The winner will be selected and revealed on Friday. The winner gets their picture posted on unKempt and if you live close enough, I will buy you a beer. No pictures of people in your office. The contest is for 'weirdest thing' so I will allow mineral and vegetable. For those of you who are sans office, I will allow you to submit something that you find in your day-to-day activities, but I because you are not limited to a building the picture will be up for review.

James Bond Drug Running

Ever since I read about the drug traffickers hiding heroine in cocaine (read here) I have been fascinated with the creativity of those moving illegal materials. Then I came across these guys in Missouri. It just goes to show how inventive some people can be.

In case they were captured, these drug runners had built a rocket that would launch the drugs our of their trunk simply by pressing on the cigarette lighter.

Ledford explained that a web of ropes and pulleys lifted the rocket into launch position when the trunk lid was opened. The rocket could then be ignited from inside the car using the dashboard cigarette lighter.

Cops are pretty certain the rocket was meant to be an escape pod for the drugs, but Ledford diplomatically declined to speculate.

"But they did have the meth inside the rocket," he admitted, "and it could be launched from inside the car."

From FlexYourRights.

The Great San Francisco Debate

The Great San Francisco Debate
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

The Budget, Gay Rights, Public Transportation, The War...

Mention any of these subjects and most San Franciscans have an opinion. Ask who makes the Best Burrito, and EVERYONE has an opinion. In walks BurritoEater.com. Using a sophisticated "Mustache Rating Scale, the owners of this site have traveled all over the city looking for the best burrito in town. Not only do they rate each burrito, but they also record how many visits they make to each taqueria.

By they way, they slighted my fav, Pancho Villa, with a lousy 6.98 (The increasingly unbearable portrait of mediocrity.) I guess I have some eating to do.

Cafeteria Creativity

Photo_06
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

This one really speaks for itself, but I cannot leave it alone.

"It's cherry season! So what are we going to offer you? Cherry Cobbler? Cherry Ice Cream? Cherry Pie?"

No. Cherries in a Cup.

The Trifecta

All-in-one
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Okay Southern friends, I am about to spout some left-coast liberal propaganda so just keep your britches on.

On a recent roadtrip, one of my friends came up with a game - Spot the Trifecta. The rules were simple. Find one car that sports all three of the following stickers: a Yellow Ribbon, Bush/Cheney 2004 and an American Flag. In San Francisco, this is almost impossible to find, but as we ventured out of the city, the chances of seeing the fabled trifecta grew. (I know we have several double spottings, but I think only one true trifecta has been spotted in the Sacramento region.)

Then today, Kelly sent me this lovely picture which in it's own right pulls the entire trifecta into one image.

(Carol also gets bonus points for spotting the enormous RV towing a Prius.)

BART

BART
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

YAY! BART did not go on strike! For those of you not in the Bay Area, the train service that connects the Peninsula, San Francisco, Oakland, Richmond, Dublin, Freemont and several other cities threatened to go on strike last night at 12:01 AM. Then they pushed it back to 12:30. Then 1:30. Finally at 3:00 AM they came to terms and the trains are still running.

Had they not, the already congested morning commute would have been flooded with an additional 319,000 people driving, car pooling and bussing adding hours to most people's commute times. I have never been more thankful for my smelly, stained BART seat.

"Soup and Sandwich"

"Soup and Sandwich"
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Mint-Chocolate Chip Ice Cream Sandwich and Hazelnut Hot Chocolate Soup

Dessert. I love it when chefs take everyday dishes and make them with the finest ingredients. This was a wonderful way to finish the meal.

Veal Tenderloin

Veal Tenderloin
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Veal Tenderloin with Porcini Mushrooms, Yukon Gold Potato Gnocchi and Rosemary Veal Jus

This was the closest thing to a 'min course' that was served. At this point in the meal your tastebuds are acute and ready for more. Then comes the next course...

Liberty Farms Duck

Liberty Farms Duck
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Liberty Farms Duck with Du Puy Lentils and "Frisee aux Lardons"

Yum, yum, yum. We were right back on track with this one. I loved the little quail egg on top.

Wild King Salmon

Wild King Salmon
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

Wild King Salmon with braised artichokes and Albarino Sauce

Not the best. In fact this was the only disappointing dish on the menu. Comparatively speaking it was still a good dish.

The rest of dinner

Meditarian Rouget
Originally uploaded by Sub Commander.

This dinner report has gone on too long, (I am getting bored of it) so here are the rest of the courses.

Mediterranean Rouget with Tomotoe, Basil and Olive Oil

PAIRING Something expensive.

This was good.

NASA is changing the future!

No one wants to hear that the government is altering the future, but a Russian astrologist has taken legal action against NASA. Her argument - By crashing the spacecraft into the comet, NASA has effectivly changed her horoscope.

"It is obvious that elements of the comet's orbit, and correspondingly the ephemeris, will change after the explosion, which interferes with my astrology work and distorts my horoscope," said Marina Bai.

Shouldn't her horoscope have warned her of great changes in her future?

Read more at Reuters.